The Uninvited Cyst

As you may know from reading my blog, we are aiming to start my first InVitro process in the next few weeks. Today, I saw my doctor to touch base and see where we’re at in terms of timing. I’ve had the NuvaRing in for almost three weeks to give my ovaries a much needed break and I had expected the doctor to tell me that I could take it out today. However, there was something we both didn’t plan on: The Uninvited Cyst.

There is a cyst hanging around on my left ovary. It’s basically a loiterer cyst left over from the Clomid I took for the IUI we did in February. Its presence could possibly screw up the schedule we had planned for our IVF. I’m not amused.

I would like to state for the record that I’m aware this isn’t horrible news. What it is though, is very annoying news. And as long as making statements for the record, I’d like to speak directly to the cyst if I may: “I hate you cyst. You are not welcome. Go away. You’re screwing up my schedule.”

Look, I always try to have a sense of humor, which I hope is obvious but there are moments like now when it’s difficult. I’ve been a good sport during this whole thing. For almost a year and a half, I’ve endured endless sonograms, countless blood tests, and I’ve had my legs up in the air more times then Jenna Jameson. I’ve quit caffeine, alcohol, tofu, soy, taken endless pills and vitamins, had HCG shots, suffered from various side effects, had exceptionally timed sex, peed on sticks either for ovulation or a pregnancy test (which is ALWAYS negative) and now, I’m about to put my body (and sanity) through a very invasive procedure that has no guarantee of working. I’ve gotten through it all by making jokes, maintaining my sense of humor, and occasionally imagining the deaths of those who annoy me (all in good fun). Like all you, I’m doing the best I can.

I have a week before my next sonogram and the hope is that this uninvited cyst will be gone by then so even though I’m not in a laughing mood at present, I’m going to once again try and figure out how to deal with this possibly annoying setback. Aside from the obvious ‘eat healthy, keep the NuvaRing in longer, drink lots of water, and visualize the cyst disappearing’, I’m seriously considering naming the cyst after one of my many hated ex-boyfriends. That way, I can address it by name on a daily basis… and tell it to kindly f*ck off.

Please wish me luck.